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Anakin Skywalker Reveals He Was The One That Fed Rick Ross His Pears
by Drew Valdez -- Not too long ago Rick Ross had one of the more notorious weight loss transformations among celebrities. The...
Weekly Report
Dec 23, 2020
Woman Dies; Brought Back To Life By The Existence Of Hayley From Paramore
by Drew Valdez -- Hudson Memorial Hospital experienced a medical marvel last week as a woman suddenly woke 3 minutes and 39 seconds after...
Weekly Report
Dec 22, 2020
1-13 Jets Feel Unstoppable After Beating Rams; Eyeing Super Bowl Appearance
by Kyle Robinson -- The Jets were able to stave off an attempted comeback from the Rams to hold onto a 23-20 victory on week 15 of the...
Weekly Report
Dec 21, 2020
Unemployed Man Seeks Out Opportunities To Push Cameraman Out Of The Way To Feel Important
by Kyle Robinson -- Having recently been laid off as a ditch digger/refiller, Allen Turnwrench finally saw his opportunity to realize his...
Weekly Report
Dec 20, 2020
Mookie Betts Released By Dodgers For Not Listing Preffered Pronouns In Twitter Bio
by Kyle Robinson -- The Los Angeles Dodgers had to make a tough move by releasing outfielder Mookie Betts after it was discovered by...
Weekly Report
Dec 20, 2020
Dasani Makes Huge Splash After Striking Deal With Travis Scott
by Drew Valdez -- La Flame continues his streak of major collaborations as he has officially signed to be one of Dasani’s new...
Weekly Report
Dec 20, 2020
Man Killed By Girlfriend After He Claimed He “Didn’t Know Who That B*tch Was”
by Drew Valdez -- Sad news strikes again as we’ve learned a man was killed by his girlfriend last night. The homicide occurred after the...
Weekly Report
Nov 22, 2020
Washington Football Team Adopts Unofficial Nickname: Redskins (Unrelated To Teams History)
by Kyle Robinson -- The Washington Football Team (WFT) has had trouble garnering much enthusiasm from effectively not having a team name...
Weekly Report
Nov 21, 2020
Megan Thee Stallion Tears ACL In Horrific Twerking Accident; Out For Season
by Drew Valdez -- Like many superstars as of late, rapper Megan Thee Stallion is offering a MasterClass. The subject: Advanced Twerking....
Weekly Report
Nov 21, 2020
Elliot Blames Report Of 2-7 Start To Season On ‘Russian Disinformation Campaign’
by Kyle Robinson -- “The idea that we have only won two of our seven games this season is completely false and a ‘TOTAL HOAX.’” A Visibly...
Weekly Report
Nov 21, 2020
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